Ole and the wife
- posted on 15-March-2006
- This post is archived
Ole staggered home very late after another evening with his drinking Buddy, Sven.
He took off his shoes to avoid waking his wife, Lena. He Tiptoed as quietly as he could toward the stairs leading to their upstairs bedroom, but misjudged the bottom step. As he caught himself by grabbing the banister, his body swung around and he landed heavily on his rump. A whiskey bottle in each back pocket broke and made the landing especially painful. Managing not to yell, Ole sprung up, pulled down his pants, and looked in the hall mirror to see that his butt cheeks were cut and bleeding.
He managed to quietly find a full box of band-Aids and began putting a Band-Aid as best he coul d on each place he saw blood. He then hid the now almost empty Band-Aid box and shuffled and stumbled his way to bed.
In the morning, Ole woke up with searing pain in both his head and butt and Lena staring at him from across the room.
She said, "You were drunk again last night weren't you Ole?"
Ole said, "Why you say such a mean thing?"
"Well," Lena said, "it could be the open front door, it could be the broken glass at the bottom of the stairs, it could be the drops of blood trailing through the house, it could be your bloodshot eyes, but mostly... it's all those Band-Aids stuck on the hall mirror."
He took off his shoes to avoid waking his wife, Lena. He Tiptoed as quietly as he could toward the stairs leading to their upstairs bedroom, but misjudged the bottom step. As he caught himself by grabbing the banister, his body swung around and he landed heavily on his rump. A whiskey bottle in each back pocket broke and made the landing especially painful. Managing not to yell, Ole sprung up, pulled down his pants, and looked in the hall mirror to see that his butt cheeks were cut and bleeding.
He managed to quietly find a full box of band-Aids and began putting a Band-Aid as best he coul d on each place he saw blood. He then hid the now almost empty Band-Aid box and shuffled and stumbled his way to bed.
In the morning, Ole woke up with searing pain in both his head and butt and Lena staring at him from across the room.
She said, "You were drunk again last night weren't you Ole?"
Ole said, "Why you say such a mean thing?"
"Well," Lena said, "it could be the open front door, it could be the broken glass at the bottom of the stairs, it could be the drops of blood trailing through the house, it could be your bloodshot eyes, but mostly... it's all those Band-Aids stuck on the hall mirror."
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Comments(8)
Posted by Badja
on 15-March-2006
Lol, lets hope all the hard work and stress u go through at college doesn't cause u to drink everynight and turn out like Ole...cept ur mom will play the part of Lena :p Move out with your woman already old mans!!
Lol, lets hope all the hard work and stress u go through at college doesn't cause u to drink everynight and turn out like Ole...cept ur mom will play the part of Lena :p Move out with your woman already old mans!!
Posted by FSG
on 16-March-2006
Please dont move out with your woman :/ You are hardly ever online anymore!!! Mommies are good. Laundry, cooking etc etc Just dont turn out like Ole *nod nod nod* OH OH unless you have winnie the poo plasters. HA HA!
Please dont move out with your woman :/ You are hardly ever online anymore!!! Mommies are good. Laundry, cooking etc etc Just dont turn out like Ole *nod nod nod* OH OH unless you have winnie the poo plasters. HA HA!
Posted by Dave
on 16-March-2006
lolol im not moving out?! i have no money - sides i just got the worlds biggest double bed ive even seen.. it takes up like 85% of my room.. Mmmm good sleeping ahead. i can lay spread eagle on my bed for once in my life ( and no dont think norty things :( .. )
I'm hardly online cos of my college crap - not cos of woman :P
lolol im not moving out?! i have no money - sides i just got the worlds biggest double bed ive even seen.. it takes up like 85% of my room.. Mmmm good sleeping ahead. i can lay spread eagle on my bed for once in my life ( and no dont think norty things :( .. )
I'm hardly online cos of my college crap - not cos of woman :P
Posted by HyperAxe
on 18-March-2006
Lol! I nearly fell of my chair with this one. This is really funny! Hehehehehe! :)
Lol! I nearly fell of my chair with this one. This is really funny! Hehehehehe! :)
Posted by ibis
on 23-March-2006
Hey Dave, I saw a banner at the bottom of the post saying "do you know jesus?" and I was like, WTF?
Sheesh, don't do that to me man, I can't take these shocks ;) was only a while later that I realised it's a random banner for another blog. Whew. I thought for a minute you were turning all religious on us here.
Anyway, I originally set out to comment that it's a cool joke :)
Hey Dave, I saw a banner at the bottom of the post saying "do you know jesus?" and I was like, WTF?
Sheesh, don't do that to me man, I can't take these shocks ;) was only a while later that I realised it's a random banner for another blog. Whew. I thought for a minute you were turning all religious on us here.
Anyway, I originally set out to comment that it's a cool joke :)
Posted by Pugs
on 29-March-2006
That post had me laughing out loud alright... Can just imagine that, done something very similar myself.. Ha! Ha! Ha!
That post had me laughing out loud alright... Can just imagine that, done something very similar myself.. Ha! Ha! Ha!
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